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The Final Goodbye.

24 Apr

Well, here we are again a thousand miles apart.
Searching for answers & looking for a new place to start-
Didn’t you know that the clock is ticking? I’m moving on.
Don’t even bother looking for me once I’m gone-
Even IF you find me, I will never be the person I was when I was with you.
Cause without you my heart broke into pieces; you left me with no one to turn to-
Where are you when I’m lonely? When my emotions are undone?
If this was a war, it’s safe to say you won-
Where are you when I’m laughing? Or when my tears start to hit the floor?
Not where I need you to be; cause you’re not knocking at my door-
Yes, it works both ways, but you don’t need me like I need you.
Because you’re stronger then I am, it shows in everything you do-
Yet you aren’t strong enough to let go of your pride.
So I guess I’ll have to get used to seeing someone else standing by your side-
I was so easily replaced; it’s like you didn’t even have to try.
So I guess everything that we once were has come down to this final goodbye-

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AN OUTSIDER.

24 Apr

The pounding of my head wasn’t helping me think straight. I felt as if I’d been lead into a trap. Only everyone knew it was a trap, except for me. But no one bothered to stop me or warn me. They just watched as I walked into what soon would be the death of me. Maybe not physically. But emotionally. Emotionally I am dead. I suddenly became aware of who I am. I am an outsider. The only people who even dare to treat me with kindness are those who wish me the most harm. Trust and Love are words that I no longer know the meaning to. Because I am surrounded by lies and hate. I always knew the world was a cruel place. But a world where friends turn on friends is beyond cruel. All I know is complete, and utter chaos.

No longer friends.

20 Apr

So Marlee asked me for her stuff back. Her clothes and such. I think that is the most immature thing to do. I cannot believe she replaced me. If she told me that for the years we were friends I meant nothing to her I’d probably believe her. During the time we were “Bestfriends” She kissed the guy I liked, Cuddled and held hands with one of my boyfriends, told one of my good guy friends that I’m a slutt, and bad mouthed me to so many other people. I can’t believe I put up with her shit for so long. It still hurts though; knowing that someone that I’d take a bullet for couldn’t care less about me. People are so fake. I’m tired of being used and letting people walk all over me. Why is being nice so hard? Why can’t people just be nice back when you’re nice instead of taking advantage of you? The human race is so selfish.